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NSFW Material Viewed at Work

9/5/2016

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Picture("What a creative use of body paint.")
​While surfing the web during office hours, regional manager Orson Paul stumbled upon a link that had been flagged as NSFW, or Not Safe For Work.  Despite this warning and the apparent risk it posed, he clicked on it anyway, once he had shut all the blinds of his corner office.  He did this knowing full well what the acronym meant, sources say.
 
“It’s not that I misunderstand the moniker.  I get it,” Mr. Paul said. “It’s just that the rules don’t apply to everyone.  In this case, the privacy of my office removes the ‘unsafe’ element from the equation.  If someone knocks on my door, it’s a simple matter to just close out of that incognito tab, no harm done.”

​Mr. Paul admits it’s just a part of life sometimes, and knows some of his workers cross that line now and again, with the not-so-subtle lean in towards the monitor.  It’s not uncommon for ordinary employees across the nation to ignore the NSFW banner outlined in red, despite the fact that they are on the clock.  In fact, a recent study claims that as much as 3.5% of the average male’s paycheck is for time spent viewing such images while maintaining an illusion of productivity.
 
“Sometimes curiosity gets the better of you,” Mr. Paul admitted, focused intently on his monitor. “Like this one.  Fifteen Racy Pictures of Models Holding Pineapples.  How could I pass that up?  Not just on the off chance I might see some boobs.  I want to know the story there.  Why are they holding pineapples?  Who has assembled this gallery?  Truly, the Not Safe part of NSFW usually comes in… fuck.  Yep, there it is.  Penises.  Penises everywhere.  They’re not even using the pineapples to cover up.  Every damn time.”
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