(Other ways to ingest include a refreshing salad, cooking into bread, or a liquefied form taken intravenously.) Do you want to get healthy, but think you’ll puke if you see another piece of Kale? Sure, it’s healthy, but those green leaves showing up in every form, from shakes to crispy oven-baked chips that turn to ash in your mouth, gets tiring. That’s why you’ll be pleased to know that a healthier green has been identified: the four-leaf clover.
You may have wiled away the hours of your childhood picking through bushels of clovers as a child, looking for that good luck charm with four leaves instead of three. But did you know that ingesting them has health-boosting properties? In a study done by the prestigious University of Okoboji Department of Alternative Medicine, several new benefits have been discovered.
You may have wiled away the hours of your childhood picking through bushels of clovers as a child, looking for that good luck charm with four leaves instead of three. But did you know that ingesting them has health-boosting properties? In a study done by the prestigious University of Okoboji Department of Alternative Medicine, several new benefits have been discovered.
Test subject reported improved moods, a libido rivaling that of a bunny in its sexual prime, drastic weight loss, and in one case, the ability to conduct photosynthesis through the skin. No need to eat anymore after that (except for your clover supplements, of course!)
Those questionable and scientifically unsupported claims not doing it for you? Well, for those nay-sayers out there, there is one undeniable result of consuming four-leaf clovers: luck. This doesn’t need any laboratory tests. Just look at history! There’s an entire holiday celebrating this magnificent plant, and an entire country built upon the positive effects of its luck (either Ireland or Scotland, I can’t remember. One of the –lands.)
We recommend a nutritious glass of twenty-five hundred blended four-leaf clovers before bed every night. The resulting luck will improve your life exponentially.
I know what you’re thinking. Sign me up! If you’re ready to start a new chapter of your life, you have two options. Either you can go out and collect these clovers yourself—good luck, the ratio is about one four-leaf for every ten thousand three-leafs—or you can engage in our reasonably priced delivery service in which we provide you with the necessary ingredients.
We have several different strains of four-leaf clovers, each named after the nuclear power plants adjacent to where they’re grown. The Chernobyl blend is particularly popular; as an added bonus, that strain often has extra leaves, ranging anywhere from five to fifty-six! (The company is not liable for any complications that occur when ingesting clovers with ten or more petals).
Sign up for our program and soon enough you’ll be a sex god with 0% body fat, boundless energy, and perhaps a faint green glow to your skin (whether this is from the plant or radiation, we’re not entirely sure).
Those questionable and scientifically unsupported claims not doing it for you? Well, for those nay-sayers out there, there is one undeniable result of consuming four-leaf clovers: luck. This doesn’t need any laboratory tests. Just look at history! There’s an entire holiday celebrating this magnificent plant, and an entire country built upon the positive effects of its luck (either Ireland or Scotland, I can’t remember. One of the –lands.)
We recommend a nutritious glass of twenty-five hundred blended four-leaf clovers before bed every night. The resulting luck will improve your life exponentially.
I know what you’re thinking. Sign me up! If you’re ready to start a new chapter of your life, you have two options. Either you can go out and collect these clovers yourself—good luck, the ratio is about one four-leaf for every ten thousand three-leafs—or you can engage in our reasonably priced delivery service in which we provide you with the necessary ingredients.
We have several different strains of four-leaf clovers, each named after the nuclear power plants adjacent to where they’re grown. The Chernobyl blend is particularly popular; as an added bonus, that strain often has extra leaves, ranging anywhere from five to fifty-six! (The company is not liable for any complications that occur when ingesting clovers with ten or more petals).
Sign up for our program and soon enough you’ll be a sex god with 0% body fat, boundless energy, and perhaps a faint green glow to your skin (whether this is from the plant or radiation, we’re not entirely sure).