Did you know that Senator Kaine Dill Kelly voted 35 times to raise the deficit? He proposed stealing money from our hardest working, wealthiest Americans in order to fund entitlements like free wifi for hipsters and healthcare.
Sentator Kelly thinks that Superman could beat Goku in a fight.
In 2014, Senator Kelly accidentally liked a tweet that called for punching kittens in the face. He quickly unliked the tweet, but we know that it was no accident. Kelly frequently punches his own cat in the face.
Senator Kelly is on record saying “do you ever think that maybe Thanos was right?”
It is rumored that Senator Kelly is actually a 117-year old vampire who is in a romantic relationship with an underage teen girl. Yet he constantly lobbies for bills that would put pedophiles like him in jail. Can we trust a hypocrite like this in office?
Senator Kelly reportedly watches a ton of anime. He even has a body pillow that he says is his waifu. He uses words like “baka” and “kawaii” in everyday conversation, and wears cat ears when he goes out to eat. Kelly is a total otaku weeb nerd.
In a clear abuse of power, Senator Kelly once filibustered the senate for nearly thirteen hours so he could read aloud his novel. He should clearly be picked up for a lucrative book deal rather than being in the US Senate.
When it comes time to vote this November, don’t vote for Kelly. Vote for the other guy.
Kelly. Wrong for Minnesota, right for a book deal. Seriously, he’s really talented. Someone pick up his manuscript.
Sentator Kelly thinks that Superman could beat Goku in a fight.
In 2014, Senator Kelly accidentally liked a tweet that called for punching kittens in the face. He quickly unliked the tweet, but we know that it was no accident. Kelly frequently punches his own cat in the face.
Senator Kelly is on record saying “do you ever think that maybe Thanos was right?”
It is rumored that Senator Kelly is actually a 117-year old vampire who is in a romantic relationship with an underage teen girl. Yet he constantly lobbies for bills that would put pedophiles like him in jail. Can we trust a hypocrite like this in office?
Senator Kelly reportedly watches a ton of anime. He even has a body pillow that he says is his waifu. He uses words like “baka” and “kawaii” in everyday conversation, and wears cat ears when he goes out to eat. Kelly is a total otaku weeb nerd.
In a clear abuse of power, Senator Kelly once filibustered the senate for nearly thirteen hours so he could read aloud his novel. He should clearly be picked up for a lucrative book deal rather than being in the US Senate.
When it comes time to vote this November, don’t vote for Kelly. Vote for the other guy.
Kelly. Wrong for Minnesota, right for a book deal. Seriously, he’s really talented. Someone pick up his manuscript.